A mum-of-two has launched a support platform to help stressed out brides after battling trauma while planning her own nuptials.
After getting engaged, Amy Patterson, 24, from Manchester, became overwhelmed when her son Charlie, now 15 months, was diagnosed with talipes equinovarus, also referred to as club foot.
He went onto become severely unwell with a host of serious issues, in the space of just two months.
In addition to this, she was also grieving the loss of her beloved nan, Helen, 76.
These incidents all came together just as she was attempting to plan her wedding.
Thankfully, Amy’s son is now recovering, and she went onto marry husband, Andy Smethurst, 23, in June 2022.
But after her experiences, Amy knew she wanted to help others. Now, she’s started her own wedding planning business, Brideplan, which offers pre-wedding counselling to couples struggling with the stress of organising their big day.
‘Mental wellbeing had to be a pivotal part of Brideplan,’ says Amy, who is also mum to Amelia, six. ‘I wanted to offer a solution to couples other than voicing their concerns and problems to unqualified strangers.’
Amy was overjoyed when Andy proposed in January 2021 while she was pregnant, but her excitement was overshadowed by the loss of her beloved nan, Helen.
‘We would speak nearly every day,’ said Amy.
‘There is nothing that I wouldn’t tell her, and she always had my back. She was always in my corner and my number one supporter.’
‘She passed away in December 2020. But Andy had already told her that he had the ring, so she knew he was going to propose.
‘I also managed to tell her that I was pregnant in November, and she was so happy for us.’
Amy was 16 weeks pregnant when a scan revealed their baby had talipes equinovarus, a foot abnormality where the foot points downwards and inwards.
‘The sonographer said we needed to go to hospital because something didn’t look right with his feet,’ she said.
‘I was then referred to a consultant and our baby was diagnosed with talipes.’
‘I had never in a million years thought of it. Talipes affects one in 1000 children, according to the NHS. It was a difficult time, but we had to wait until he was here to understand how severe it was.’
Amy gave birth to Charlie on her nan’s birthday – July 18 2021.
‘It was really special,’ she recalled.
‘The chances of it happening were quite rare. We now had another reason to celebrate her birthday. Obviously, my son never got to meet her so it’s also a connection between them as well.’
Things were going well but as Amy focused on her baby boy, wedding planning fell by the wayside.
‘Charlie was in a cast from four weeks old,’ she said.
‘Then at nine weeks old he had an operation on his Achilles tendon in the back of his heel, then [during recovery, he wore] boots with a bar between them.
‘When he first had the boots on, he pretty much cried for 36 hours straight.’
And when poor Charlie became gravely ill in March 2022, Amy was terrified for her son’s life.
‘Before March we started to feel like things were getting back on track,’ she noted.
‘But then Charlie caught Covid. Then a few weeks later we got a phone call from the nursery saying he was extremely unwell.
‘By the time we got there, he was shaking, and his lips were blue. While rushing him to A&E Charlie had a seizure in the car. It was terrifying but I had to stay calm.
‘The doctors started treating him for sepsis and then he was diagnosed with scarlet fever after two days.
‘But a few weeks later we were back in hospital because Charlie had bronchiolitis and then two weeks later in May, he just took an absolute nosedive.’
She added: ‘He was extremely ill, he had a fit and his temperature was 41.3 degrees.
‘The doctors told us he had developed pneumonia overnight in one of his lungs. It was the worst time of my life.’
Diagnosed with PTSD in March 2022, Amy knew she needed help.
‘Charlie was just deteriorating in front of my eyes,’ she said.
‘It was absolutely horrific. There is no worse feeling in this world than if you think that your child might not survive, it was horrific.
‘So I reached out to a counsellor. It was really helpful to speak to someone.
‘I had put wedding planning on the backburner. We had the venue and suppliers, but I just couldn’t respond in the run up.
‘Counselling made a big difference and allowed me to move forward with the wedding.’
While browsing wedding forums, Amy discovered that many brides-to-be were struggling too.
‘I ended up coming across some forums and they were really heavy,’ she explained.
‘People were just pouring their hearts out on these forums and I just thought to myself that these people need support – there’s got to be a better way.’
Amy benefited greatly from counselling and wanted other couples to have the same options.
‘Most people are engaged between 18 months to three years,’ she said. ‘Anything can happen.’
Launching Brideplan in November 2022, Amy hopes to offer a solution to couples facing one of life’s biggest events.
‘I wanted to be able to support couples to plan their wedding whilst also helping them manage the situations going on in their life and their fears, anxieties and stresses,’ she added.
‘Brideplan provides access to qualified BACP counsellors, specialising in wedding related issues, offering support with any issues in your life whilst planning your wedding.
‘I’m very driven but I’ve also had a lot of support from my family and friends. It’s been a team effort.’
She described her wedding as ‘one of the best days’ of her life and now Charlie is healthy and thriving.
‘He’s much better,’ she said.
‘He now only wears his boots overnight and is doing well.
‘I wouldn’t hesitate to recommend counselling. Reaching out to a therapist to work through my issues allowed me to enjoy every single second of my big day.’
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